An Especially Pinteresting Prose

Now, this is the story all about how

My life got flipped-turned upside down

And I'd like to take a minute

Just sit right there

I'll tell you how I became 

the princess of a town called It's Time to Care.

I found my why! 

 Keep up with them, maintain life with them.  Tomato, tomahto.

So I started doing something about it. 

There are countless failed attempts spanning the largest frustrations of life in the last 10 of my years. Today, however, is different.  Today I believe I'm great.  Today, I will make it happen. 

Find your why, then find today and be present.  

No matter what it looks like.

It is not always easy, in fact most days are difficult.  Difficult to get out of the old mindset and go for it.  Difficult to say yes and believe it. Difficult to say no, and be it. Difficult to feel it.  

Difficult to feel the eyes looking at it.

But then again, who am I to know what difficult really means?

 And if she can do it, I can do it.

And if I can do it, you can do it. 

It's exceedingly simple: Do it.

And never stop.

If you have a moment, have your moment.  Then keep going.

You get stuck?  You "wish you knew how" to do it? You're not seeing results?

"Five minutes in a bad environment can ruin a week of hard work." 

-Somebody I heard say this once and I totally believe them.

 Because really, the scale is only a tool to help measure progress.  It's not the evaluation of the century.  Respect the scale for what it is.

 A little gain isn't always a bad thing.

On the flip side, 

Never be mad with progress.

Waiting for the right time? It's time. Care about yourself.  Do it anyway because I know you can.

I mean, I pulled up to the gym about 7 or 8

And I yelled to the old me, "Yo homes, smell ya later!"

I looked at my Kingdom and I was finally there

To sit on my throne as the princess of It's Time to Care.

My Pinteresting story?  A light bulb clicked the day that I saw this silly little meme, in a most profound way.

The realization that I have a choice to be awesome regardless of anything else happening around me shattered so many toxic beliefs I had about myself. I am awesome!  

  Your life is riding on what you choose to believe.  Believe in happiness, and happy you will be. 

Week Three

Here is my infamous third week...

Monday:
I'm doing so well, I have so much energy, I feel fantastic and it's Mother's Day (or any day that says treats are in the forecast); I can treat myself to this!

Tuesday:
I still LOST weight yesterday despite eating this, so I can eat this again!  And I'll add a pop and chocolate bar for good measure because they taste soooooo good!

Wednesday:
Oh...it appears I gained twice what I lost.

Thursday:
Umm, I STARVED myself today and haven't lost an ounce.

Friday:
I SUCK.  I'm tired and sad, let's order pizza (and-eat-it-all).

Saturday:
I feel so sick for eating that. I need a nap. What the heck am I doing?!

Sunday:
I gained a whole pound. Efffffffffff...what's the point?

See the truth is, Week Three is not a plateau.  Week Three is being over-cocky and thinking I own the world.
Week Three is old habit thinking.  Week Three is one mistake, after mistake, after mistake.  Week Three represents just how far I really have to go.
Week Three is the reason why I never make it passed a Week Three, however many hundreds of Week Three's I've lived through.  Week Three is why I've been working out for seven years with a personal trainer, and still weigh well over 300 pounds.
Week Three is my own personal battle.  Week Three is the plateau that isn't.  Week Three is...Weak Any-week-of-m'life. Mindblow.

What's your Week Three look like?

Monday, WEEK 4:
Seriously.  WHAT am I doing?! (cry, breathe, pray...REFOCUS!)

This time...THIS TIME...there's a little thing called Week Four, or how about Strong All-in, screaming to break through that not-really-a-plateau-at-all.
This time, THIS TIME, make no mistake in mistaking a minor bump for a full fledged failure.  This time, I see, oh Week Three, you devil, you...that Week Three is just life, plain and simple; not really the devil, and that's okay. Life is here and there.  Life is waxing and waning.  Life is up and down.  AND THAT'S OKAY.  Week Four you will find me, strong and all in, because I've finally found you.  Why?  Because of my why.
Because, as my trainer put it, it is crystal clear.  I no longer have to question, "What's the point?"  I know the point, and they're counting on me, and I'm counting on myself.  Have you found your why?

Weak or Strong

You weigh 165 pounds. Grab your bestie, your spouse, the closest thing to human standing next to you, weighing approximately the same. Now let them ride piggy back all day long. No, let them ride for 10 years without ever letting them go, except for maybe when you're swimming!

Now take yourself with that person on your back and do anything. 

Walk to bathroom. Sit on the toilet. Get up from sitting on the toilet. 

Stand for 3 hours making dinner, sweeping the floor, picking up your 30 pound 3 1/2 year old and fixing her booboos. 

Sit down on the couch. Rest for 5 minutes. Now get up, with back buddy, and walk up the stairs to do laundry. Don't let your buddy go! Go back downstairs to load the dishwasher. Bend over, don't drop plates. Oh no! You forgot the hand towel. Run back upstairs to get it in the washer before it's too late. Come downstairs, rinse, repeat. 

Do anything with your buddy on your back. After a few minutes, you get exhausted with this now monster on your back, as it's not much less difficult trying to live the exact life that you did without your buddy.

Now get on the treadmill and start running.  Bam!  Bam!  Bam!  You bet your foot stomps are LOUD.  It's clunky. It hurts.

Throw 'em off! 

Just kidding...pick 'em up. Now go run the Spartan Race and finish it (and so what if it takes 2 hours and 44 minutes).

I am not lazy when I cannot get up, or when I'm miserably exhausted at the end of the day. 

I am tired. 

But I'm not sitting here complaining about "needing" to lose the last 10 pounds. 

I'm sitting here breaking down. My knees are shot. My ankles keep failing me. 

But I don't quit. Remember I said, "Do it anyway"?

Maybe you don't have a whole buddy on your shoulders. Maybe you're just carrying around someone's backpack full of schoolbooks. Whatever the case, this is difficult. This sucks. 

Do it anyway. 

There is a back story. There is a "how" we got to this point. How we started carrying people everywhere we go. How we let ourselves pick up those schoolbooks and how we chose to carry the people wearing those books. 

Irrelevant. Do it anyway. 

What matters is now. Right now. Right now, busted knees, wobbly ankles. Right now is my 18 month old running faster than I can keep up, running into danger sometimes. Right now is a fight. Right now I can choose life or death.

Sometimes, right now means sitting on the couch giving those busted knees and wobbly ankles a 32 ounce soda and chocolate bar for no good reason (per contra: birthday cake on your birthday is always a good reason!). And the all-consuming guilt weighs more than the buddy on the back ever could. So right now is to say, "Sorry I hurt you with that junk. Let's try again." And dropping the trash where it belongs, right now. 

The tears are okay. They are temporary. Don't allow them to turn into more chocolate bars. Turn them into walks in the park, up steep hills, with dear friends who inspire you and who are in your corner. 

Or get up that hill on your own, take in the sunshine and cool breeze standing on the top of the entire world looking down, and right now say, "I did it anyway."

Did you hear that? I heard a backpack drop. 

We will all have moments of weakness. "I can't do it anymore!" Yes. You. Can. 

Do it anyway. Allow your weak to validate your humanity. Then allow your strength to validate your awesome. 

Whether weak or strong, you're always an awesome human. 

A Great Place to Start

Identify your why:

The two most beautiful children who ever lived.

They need a mom who grows old with them.  

Yes, it's for me.  Yes, I want to do it for myself.  Yes, I have to take care of myself before I take care of anyone else, blah, blah, blah.  But why now? And how tiring is this to hear myself say this year, after year, after year?

Why not? Why not now? Why not live the life that I want right now?  

Because I'm lazy?

-Do it anyway.

Because my birthday is next month and there will be cake.

-Do it anyway.

Because I'm so tired from a long day and drive-thru is so quick and easy!

-Do it anyway.

Because I've been up for 16 hours and I couldn't possibly squeeze in 10 more minutes to walk around the block.

-Do it anyway. But it's -40! Do it anyway.

Because everything I just said is just too difficult.

-Do it anyway.

Because I think that I will fail.

-Do it anyway.

It's actually very simple. It's so simple, that we sometimes ignore simplicity.

-Do it anyway.

Why?

Because when you throw it all away to reach your why over allowing yourself to doubt with hows and whens and buts, I guarantee you that

YOU WILL change. your. life.

This week, maybe it'll be a loss of 7 pounds.